Not Mind OR Heart, But Amazing Powerful Unstoppable Team of Integrated Mind/Heart

The following are subtitles to this post:

• Intro to Mind and/or Heart

  • Is It All About the Mind?

  • Is It All About the Heart?

• Vivid Dream Reminder from Within
• A Reminder of How TEAM Mind/Heart Helps
• Examples Stories of Abusing, Misusing, and Rejecting the Mind
  • The Abuse of “Going with the Flow”
  • The Misuse of Being a Free-Spirit
  • The Very Anxious Anti-Mind Man
  • Later Updated Insights (Shadow Work)
• Recruiters of Limiting Beliefs: Hard-Core, Non-Pushy & Clever/Subtle
• Introducing the Overly Logical to the Merging of Science & Spirituality
• Deep Thoughts About Old Farts
• Rainbow Bridge Soul Teachers
• Readings Created From: Half-Ass, Don’t Give a Rat’s Ass, or Integrated Mind/Heart
• Highly Beneficial Books I Look Forward to Reading
• Why Am I Investing in This Seemingly Invisible Blog?
• Inserted on 7/19/20 => I shared the following comment for this very important video that I fully trust is a major game-changer in Life, “Gregg Braden: Unleashing the Power of the New – Conscious Life Expo 2020 FULL SHOW“:
  • Gregg Braden, thank you so much for sharing wonderful You, and your invaluable gifts/abilities/skills/talents. I’m so grateful for your precious existence, and I have no doubt that our world and beyond is in a much higher vibrational state due to your full Presence and amazing contributions. I trust that you are a Master Teacher/Master Builder/Master Healer/Master of Frequencies/Master Alchemist.

Intro to Mind and/or Heart

I often mentioned “integrated Mind/Heart” within this blog, because I’ve noticed over the years—within general society and the spiritual community—the limiting beliefs of people who only give credit to either the mind or heart, but not both.

Despite so many different opinions out there that were so adamant about being right, I intuitively and confidently sensed that these perspectives weren’t the bigger picture (expanded, Multidimensional perspective).

The following is a nonconsecutive excerpt from the reading, “Mysteries of the Human Heart“:

For 25 years, researchers at the HeartMath Institute have innovated tools and methods designed to achieve measurable heart/brain coherence […]

Rollin McCraty Ph.D., one of the original founders of Heartmath, said, “The biggest hidden source of stress on the planet is the disorganization of heart/mind, causing lack of resonance. Lack of alignment eats the life force and happiness out of humanity.”

Originally trained as a geologist, Gregg Braden explores the intersection of science and spirituality from the perspective of a trained scientist.

He speaks of the heart/brain union, saying, “Our brain receives many of its instructions on what to do from the heart. Studies show that the heart is able to think, feel, and have emotions on its own.”

Is It All About the Mind?

I’ve heard more than enough times in the past—to include within the military community—people use judgment, disrespect, denial, ridicule, criticism, and/or rejection to minimize the importance of the following Divine Feminine energies:

• following one’s heart
• embracing one’s emotions (without them being repressed, suppressed, and thus, out of control and taking over the entire ship/whole self)
• honoring one’s true feelings
• trusting one’s intuition
• being impulsive
• being highly sensitive to energies (highly sensitive)
• being creative
• being vulnerable
• deep healing
• crying (releasing)
• going with the flow
• receiving (since the Church and the rest of society, did a great job of convincing humanity of only GIVING GIVING GIVING to others (especially to them), while NOT teaching about unconditional love for the whole self as well; and we cannot truly and fully give to others from an empty cup)
• relaxing
• basking
• Unconditionally loving ALL aspects of whole self (which helps us to truly and fully do so for interconnected Life), etc.

And I’ve shared many example stories of what I mentioned right above within this blog, to include (but not limited to) the following post links:

• “Courage” (looking out for others)
• “Envy“ (“He never said anything like that to me.”)
• “Heartbreak” (not being blood-related)
• “Hurt” (taking anger out on another)
• “Rage” (dealing with adult bullies)
• “Liberating Wings of Freedom: Rising Above Childhood and/or Adulthood Abuse”
• “Acceptance” (of me being Japorean, which I’ve also shared within this blog)
• “Weak to Strong,”
• “Embracing a Setback to Set Forward” (so-called failures in life—all stepping stones of success)
• “Discovering the Beauty Behind the Walls of the Mentally Ill (Part I of II)” (the beginning of healing that later becomes deep healing during solitude; I feel that it’s healthy to balance solitude with connection to community, and one is not more important than another, just like the mind and heart)
• “Following Heart Over Mind” (I didn’t realize this then, but I now trust that my actions followed integrated Mind/Heart, not ego’s conditioned mind of what’s the “right” thing to do within society)

I wasn’t aware of this spiritual concept of integration and transformation during these times of the past; I was simply being/Being whatever aspects and/or extensions of whole self (physical human self)/Self (Source: Soul/Spirit within).

Is It All About the Heart?

I’ve also noticed people within the spiritual community who misunderstand, misuse or even abuse their biased beliefs towards the heart, where they subtly or noticeably judge, discard, disrespect, deny, ridicule, criticize and/or reject the mind’s abilities (i.e., the egoic mind, not realizing it’s full-potential, exalted state that can be transmuted and transformed into…the Higher Mind/God Mind).

And I understand this because the less spiritually evolved, immature, closed, ego’s mind—not the more spiritually evolved, mature, open Higher Mind/Divine Masculine God Mind—can be out of control and/or non-beneficial when it’s NOT connected to, and in alignment with, the Higher Heart.

But then again, the less spiritually evolved, immature, closed heart—not the more spiritually evolved, mature, open Higher Heart/Divine Feminine Goddess essence—can wreak havoc on our overall well-being as well (like out of control emotions that can EXPLODE like a volcano from all the pressure of having been oppressed, repressed and suppressed).

However, I trust that the more we’re willing to open both our mind and heart, the more we’ll be able to discover the merging of the two into One (or the already existing merge)—as integrated Mind/Heart, aka God & Goddess as One, I (God) AM (Goddess) Presence.

Vivid Dream Reminder from Within

By the way, on 4/5/20—when I started this draft post—I had a vivid dream of the color turquoise, and I felt excited about it:

This reading, “Color Meaning: Meaning of The Color Turquoise” provides further details for the interpretation of the color turquoise, but I will only share the following that relates to this post:

The turquoise gemstone is a stone that represents self-realization [balance] and is an aid in analytical thinking [mind] as well as creative energy [heart].

A Reminder of How TEAM Mind/Heart Helps

The following excerpt is from a post earlier this month, “FAREWELL Energizer Bunnies on Crack: HELLO New Energies of Simply BEING Multidimensional,” which also reminds me of the importance of Mind + Heart:

Doubts can set in during these phases of life, that can seem challenging, daunting, and even hopeless at times.

However, when I expand my perspective—further open mind and heart to integrated Mind/Heart—I’ reminded that I can definitely learn and grow from what I’m willing to notice, acknowledge, embrace, integrate, heal, and transform.

So I’m reminded that there are no coincidences, just Divine intervention from our core essence—highest power (Divine Power), unconditional love (Divine Love), and profound wisdom (Divine Wisdom) from within.

Examples Stories of Abusing, Misusing, and Rejecting the Mind

Below are some examples stories of believing that one is all spiritual, but missing a major part—like the other half of the whole.

The Abuse of “Going with the Flow”

The following is an excerpt from a post within the initial Sedona post series titled, “The Unexpected Encounters with Wounded Wounders in Sedona” that’s an example of how the pure essence of ‘going with the flow” can be abused:

Strength, in any form, that is misused or abused is NOT true power (Divine Power from Soul/Spirit within).

One day, while the female manager went out for her smoke break, her two clients showed up on time for their session [aura photography].

After a couple of minutes, I called my manager just in case she lost track of time, and she said she was on her way.

Upon arriving to the store, she shared a story with me (in a slightly irritated tone) that was meant to convey in an indirect manner, “Don’t ever call me again while I’m on my smoke break, to inform me of clients waiting.”

She said that about a year ago, the male manager [the owners’ son, who’s technically in charge] brought it up to her attention that she needs to keep her scheduled session times.

She told him (in an aggressive tone) that she goes with the flow, so if her clients really want her service, they can just wait.

Since then, the male manager apparently continued confronting her about this ongoing issue for almost a year [I don’t why they didn’t just fire her. I take that back, I recall that it was because they felt sorry for her because she kept using/milking the sad story of her history of being a drug addict, and how she temporarily fell into a coma; and she was also the best friend of the female manager who worked at the sister, crystal store. This is a great reminder that we can obtain wisdom from our past, negative life experiences, and use them for everyone’s highest benefit, or we can use our past to continue playing a victim in order to manipulate others in unsavory ways].

The conclusion to this story is that my female manager basically won the argument, and does what she pleases.

I love going with the flow as well, but that doesn’t mean we do so while not fully fulfilling our end of our agreed upon responsibility, and not respecting others’ rights.

If the female manager’s service was free, and she informed clients ahead of time what to expect, then it would be okay to keep them waiting. But I have no doubt that they have other plans too.

I normally share such insights with a person directly, but I’ve made attempts before to honestly, tactfully, fully and freely communicate with her, but I’ve learned that she’s only all ears if the subject at hand doesn’t hurt her ego.

Insights Inserted on 4/26 + 28/20: 

When I expand my perspective, I realize that the above mentioned manager was mirroring to me (at the time) the “negative” unknown/shadow aspects of whole self—that’s been repressed since childhood and suppressed during adulthood (due to society’s disapproval of such “wrong” or “bad” aspects)—who only:

• wanted to feel empowered, by acting as if she’s the top dog/head boss—while refusing to respect others’ authority—since she didn’t know any other way to connect with her already existing inner power from within, the Divine Power that doesn’t need to misuse or abuse power
• wanted to be heard by others, by often being so intensely angry, aggressive, defensive, and a loud-ass, since she forgot (as a soul) that more people will hear her out from her peaceful, gentle, open, and assertive way (the “I respect you and you respect me” effective communication style)
• wanted to feel love from others, by using her negative past experiences as a crutch, since she didn’t know any other way to connect with her already existing, unlimited Unconditional Love (Divine Love) from within
• wanted to feel more wise about life by often sharing information about spirituality that she read from books, since she didn’t know any other way to:
  • connect with her already existing inner wisdom (the ability to transform negative life experiences into highly beneficial ones)
  • be able to obtain true wisdom (experiential knowledge) via LIVING love-based, spiritual concepts
  • as well as embrace Divine Wisdom, intuitively trusting that EVERYTHING that happens, occurs for our soul’s highest benefit

I now clearly SEE you shadow aspects, and I fully embrace and integrate you into whole self. Let us merge as One, Be an amazing team, fully enjoy the rest of Life together, and highly benefit whole self/interconnected Life within this world and beyond. I love you.

The Misuse of Being a Free-Spirit

While working at the Hilton Bell Rock in Sedona, I met a very sweet, free-spirited, young woman who was very much into spirituality.

She was a vegan, she was very adamant about recycling, she often expressed spirituality teachings that she read somewhere, etc.

And she even took a belly dancing class—which initially tickled me upon hearing about it—and I then experienced it for the first time on January 2, 2020 (with instructor Carrie from Sedona), thanks to my coworker introducing the fun idea into my awareness.

Side Note: I was also further drawn to this idea because one of the Master Practitioners from my last Sedona job, had invited everyone at the company to watch her perform belly dancing (a hobby) for the first time in seven years.

I was so excited for her, that I accidentally clicked on “reply all” when I sent the email response that I was ‘so there’ (to celebrate with her)!

And the owner of the company sent me a disapproving email that everyone shouldn’t have to be bothered with such emails; and I informed her that it was an accident, apologized, and reassured her that it wouldn’t happen again.

Now that I think of it, there are no accidents or coincidences, I was meant to click on “reply on” so that everyone could be a witness to at least one person supporting this coworker in one of her passions (who’s also a single mom with two children). 

I was so glad that I went to this event —held at the OTCA in Cottonwood, where I shared a review—because 1) I intensely felt very high vibrations of excitement, passion, awe and joy come to life within me (because I LOVE dancing), and 2) I didn’t see anyone else from our company there, and I wondered why no one else came, especially the owner and her husband, who often said how much they appreciate their employees.

I’ve already shared some stories in one of the Sedona post series, but in a nutshell, what initially started out as flowers, sunshine, and rainbows, ended up with some heavy, dark storms.

This included my coworker (from Hilton) often doing whatever she wanted to do—while not asking management how they felt about it—and doing an unrecognizable, extreme 180 whenever things didn’t change the way she wanted.

She was often late to work, so much so that I convinced my Supervisor and Manager at one point to give her another chance (since she really needed the job).

I shared a story with her about my first unit within the Army (back in 2002), and how I was late to formation because I woke up late; hence, I was reprimanded.

However, since that day, I bought extra alarm clocks and placed them at the corners of the room so that I wouldn’t accidentally turn them off while half-asleep.

Side note: Granted, I don’t blame myself for being immensely tired when I was new to my first unit, because the overall Army life—more so at a tactical unit rather than a strategic one—is extremely challenging on all energetic levels (physical, mental, emotional, and spiritual).

A typical day starts from around 4:30 a.m. to 6:00 p.m. (depending on the unit)—and much later as one goes up the ranks—along with sporadic 24 hour staff duty, monthly surprise alert drills, field exercises, TDY, tactical and technical training, duties for various levels within the unit (squad, platoon, company, battalion, brigade, and even division), various inventories and inspections, ruck marches, guard duty, participating in boards, cross training with other units (like the ROK Army), unit’s volunteer work for the community, off-duty time prepping for classes, mentoring soldiers, and daily physical fitness, as well as physical fitness tests (which I’ve also shared stories about within this blog).

Anyhoo, I told her that I was determined not to ever place myself in a situation that didn’t benefit me; hence, the alarm clocks.

And I continued that perhaps she could find a solution as well if she really wanted to keep her job (since the back to back to back excuses were getting old QUICK, and our Supervisor, Manger, and Director made it crystal clear they were losing more patience with her, though each time she screwed up, she managed to beg them to let her stay).

Another time she asked me if my husband and I could come to an open-mic poetry event in Flagstaff since it was her first time.

So I agreed since I wanted to support her in pursuing her passion; and I also appreciated it when my husband was present whenever I performed open-mic poetry or comedy in various locations (within two different states).

However, she was late AGAIN, and when I gave the MC a heads up, she told me that they were going to take my coworker off the list.

I managed to convince the MC to give my coworker a little more time, though she was reluctant at first; and sure enough, she barely made it.

Once, while our manager was having a talk with her about her habit in front of another coworker and I—since the one-on-one method wasn’t effective—my coworker glared into space and blamed her “psychotic” roommate for making her late. 

She even came up with the idea that her roommate snuck into her room in the middle of the night, while she was sleeping, and turned off her alarm clock (that she bought after listening to my suggestion).

While my coworker was telling this story, I witnessed my other coworker (a young and smart female) glare at her as though she was full of it; and it was pretty clear my manager wasn’t buying the story either.

However, we never know what the truth is unless we were there. I suppose this story could’ve been true since there are many probabilities in life.

In addition, when I first met her roommate at the open-mic poetry event, it became a moment I may not ever forget.

When my coworker introduced me to her roommate, I smiled and said, “Hi, I’m Barbara,” while extending my hand out to shake hers.

However COMMA I had a golden opportunity to experience something I had never experienced before my entire 40+ years of life while interacting with people (which was disturbing and fascinating, via multidimensional perspective).

Her roommate just stood there and looked at me with a pissed-off facial expression—glaring eyes, flared nostrils, and tight lips—and didn’t respond verbally or with her hand.

So rather than continue remaining in that awkward space, I just walked off. It wasn’t my loss, plus, I wasn’t about to let her ruin my night.

Looking back, if I could relive that moment, I would respond in a different way, just for shits and giggles.

I would gently say, “I realize I don’t know you like that…but you appear very intense. I do have some Smooth Move herbal tea packets in my purse for emergency situations. Would you like a cup full of relief?”

OR…I could be more serious and ask in a gentle and loving manner, “Is there something you’d like to express to me that would benefit both of us?”

But I find the first idea more entertaining! ^_^

Anyhoo, I had a talk with my coworker the next time we were on shift together, and I told her that I couldn’t help wondering why her roommate was the way she was, when I had never met her before.

I continued to intuit that either my coworker told her roommate some negative things about me (to cause her to judge me), and/or her roommate is severely insecure, and feels threatened by my coworker making a new friend (though I actually considered my coworker more like a younger sister, or even daughter-like figure).

My coworker looked a bit uncomfortable, as though she just got busted, and then tried to mask her discomfort with humor, stating that she would never say anything bad about me, and that she had noticed some red flags about her roommate over time.

At that moment, I strongly sensed something was off. I then had flashbacks of moments where she made her little comments about her observations of me always being on time, going above and beyond, and interacting with customers, etc.; but they weren’t genuine compliments, though they came with a big smile and jokey tone.

Perhaps she felt resentful that I was pretty much her opposite at work (her shadow aspects); but no one stopped her from being and doing her best.

One day, my coworker decided to take all the colorful, small, ceramic bowls—that my Supervisor had meticulously set out on a table for sale (among other products)—and used them how she wanted to use them without permission (as sugar packet holders in the fridge).

I warned her that it more than likely wasn’t a good idea; but as usual, she was in her own la la land, and basically told me not to be so uptight. I was like, “Whatever dude, you’re on your own.”

Sure enough, when my Supervisor noticed the missing bowls (about 7 or eight of them)—and had a pretty good idea who was responsible for them disappearing—she approached my coworker like a bat out of hell!

And that was the first time I ever saw my very laid-back Supervisor—white lady from Maui—become so enraged (let alone angry).

It was one of those seemingly contradicting moments of, “I feel bad for you coworker, it really sucks to be you right now. But THAT was refreshingly AWESOME!!”

This coworker often talked about how she loves being a free-spirit and going with the flow, but I reminded her that that’s great, but there’s a time and place for that; and habitually being late to work, and negatively affecting coworkers—since they can’t leave until their replacement arrives—doesn’t come from a respectful and loving space.

Soon after these series of PITA (pain in the ass) situations, my Supervisor rushed past the front desk (with a fed up expression) and shouted, “She’s out of here soon!” while making the cutthroat gesture, as though she had a glimpse of what was coming soon.

And sure enough, my coworker ended up getting fired because she continued to do whatever she felt like doing without respecting others’ boundaries.

I’m all about being a free-spirit, and being and doing what one desires, but as I mentioned in the first example story above, it’s also about doing one’s best to respect others as well.

And since she didn’t want to take others into consideration, she suffered the consequences.

Despite the Director specifically answering, “No,” to her question, she decided to be a stubborn-ass, and participate in an activity held at the Hilton pool, meant for members and guests only.

So the Supervisor had to go over to her and tell her to get out of the pool NOW.

I wondered who told our Supervisor.

Perhaps it was one of the sourpuss, white grannies (since there were some), who was like, “Oh HEYLL no!! I just bought a new, french cut bikini, and I am not about to have this young, blond b!+ch steal my 99 year old hubby’s attention from me while I’m doing water aerobics!”

Soon after our Supervisor ordered my coworker to leave the pool, which I imagine was humiliating, the HR Director—a very positive, kind, calm, and fair woman—told my coworker to pack her stuff and leave the property immediately.

My coworker said that she was shocked that she was treated that way; I straight-up told her that I wasn’t, and who could blame the HR Director for making the right decision.

After all, my coworker blatantly disrespected our Director. And when I was in the Army, and a soldier disrespected their squad leader (their direct leader), I—as the Platoon Sergeant, the direct Supervisor of that Squad Leader—would ensure that never happened again. 

Despite my coworker basically telling our Spa Director, “F!@# you!”, he apparently felt sorry for her, because while walking her out of the HR office, he told her that he’d put in a good word for her next job, which was very generous of him. 

There’s a time and a place to be an effective rebel. And if one is willing to experience the consequences, then more power to that person; but if not, then it’s not wise to screw oneself over.

The day she was fired, she called me up on my day off and started bawling hysterically.

My heart went out to her, and I did my best to comfort her, while also sharing with her what I had no doubt needed to be expressed (for her highest benefit).

I didn’t feel sorry for her because she had brought the consequences upon herself (she wasn’t a helpless victim, though she tried to play one multiple times); and I trusted that everything that was happening was for her soul’s highest benefit.

At one point, she said that when she called her father—who lives in the east coast—that she got fired, he asked in an irritated tone, “What did you do this time?”

This question caused her to cry even more, so she talked to her mother instead, who was apparently more gentle, understanding and kind.

But I’ve learned from past experiences, that there’s a time for “gentle, understanding and kind,” and then there’s a time for “tough love,” especially when the former method has been repeatedly ineffective.

I had a strong feeling that her father responded the we he did because he, too, got fed up with her ongoing, PITA drama.

After actively listening to her for about 30 minutes or so, I reassured her that, despite the temporary, outer circumstance, I trust she’s meant to move on to new life experiences that are more in alignment with who she truly desires to be, and that’s meant to further expand her consciousness; she softly agreed.

And that yes, in a perfect world, it wouldn’t be a problem for an employee to simply enjoy fun activities that the corporate company offers, especially if there’s enough room for additional people to participate in.

However, until then, it behooves us all to be discerning and wise about the choices we make, and not have the desperate need to play the blame game where we give our inner power away (which I’ve done before as well).

I continued that it’s important for our soul growth/spiritual evolution that we practice taking responsibility for all that we think, say, behave, and do.

I also reminded her of the positive that lies ahead, the opening of new doors of opportunity, to include how she wanted to visit San Diego and learn how to become a surfing instructor.

Shortly after this situation, she contacted me to see if we could meet up for tea in Sedona.

I agreed, and on that day, I got ready and was about to head out. I then received a text message from her asking if I could give her an extra 30 minutes, to which I replied, “Sure!”

After 30 minutes, I departed to Flagstaff (where I lived at the time), and arrived to the tea place in Sedona about 10 minutes prior (a habit of mine from the military, since I’d rather be early than late).

To my great surprise, she texted me again—at the exact time we were going to meet up—saying that she’s going with the flow, so she decided to eat lunch now.

I was immediately reminded to practice maintaining healthy boundaries, so I replied to her, “Take your time, I’m leaving now anyways.”

She then texted me an apologetic message that felt desperate, saying that she didn’t mean to disrespect me and that she’ll come right away.

I told her not to bother, and that I didn’t feel like meeting up anymore (since that wasn’t the first time).

She immediately did a 180 on me, and tried to make me feel as though I wronged her for expressing my perception of what happened (AGAIN), and how I truly felt about it.

I didn’t learn about this until later (from a Teal Swan video), but I believe this is an example of deflection.

One of the things that I usually love about Teal’s videos (but not always), is that she helps to provide clarity to something I experienced in the past, that I didn’t have a word or phrase for, to include, but not limited to: healthy boundaries, projection, gaslighting, ambivert, etc.).

Insights Inserted on 4/26 +30/20: 

When I expand my perspective, I realize that the above mentioned coworker was mirroring to me (at the time) the “negative” unknown/shadow aspects of whole self—that’s been repressed since childhood and suppressed during adulthood (due to society’s disapproval of such “wrong” or “bad” aspects)—who only wanted to:

• be more free in life, but not remembering (as a soul) that true freedom doesn’t need to negatively affect interconnected others, especially when there are other ways where everyone can harmoniously meet halfway.
  • Throughout my childhood, I deeply yearned more freedom since my mother was very controlling in many aspects of my life.
• be blameless, but not remembering that taking responsibility for one’s non-beneficial words and actions, is loving and empowering.
  • Throughout my childhood, I deeply wished my mother would stop blaming me for so many things that went wrong in her life and my life. 
• make this world a better place, but not remembering that trying to control others is not effective, but simply living by example is powerful and influential (even if we never receive any feedback).
  • Throughout my childhood, I had often felt powerless to make the world a better place, a world that my wished upon an atomic bomb event, since she said that humans are so many negative characteristics. So it’s understandable why this once repressed, negative shadow aspect would show up in my reality in Sedona of all places, where all the OLD, OUTDATED, fear-based energies resurface from within us—due to the powerful vortex energies that’s known to AMPLIFY—to finally be SEEN, understood, embraced, integrated, healed, and transformed.
• do whatever she felt at the moment (to include not listening to authority figures), but not remembering to take others’ time, words, actions, and feelings into consideration when necessary. Reverse the roles, how would she feel if someone habitually disrespected her time and energy, and seemed insensitive to her feelings?
  • Throughout my childhood, I had often wanted to do whatever I felt like doing at the moment; however, my parents and my relatives often told me all that I needed to do at whatever moment. 
• be thought of as a good daughter by her father—-though habitually being a pain in the rear to those around her—not remembering that it’s better to be whole than only good (as Carl Jung said); and despite her father’s disapproving tone, at the end of the day, he more than likely loves her and her siblings unconditionally (to the best of his ability).
  • My adoptive father once told me when I was in my mid-thirties (over the phone), that he appreciated me being his only kid—out of five adult kids from three, different marriages—who never caused him any trouble (i.e., drug problems, skipping school, talking back, etc.). It was one of the most heartfelt things he ever said to me. Prior to that important piece of information, I had always believed that he had loved me much less than the rest of his kids because I wasn’t blood-related at all (childhood story in post, “Heartbreak”). I trust that my coworker mirrored to me the opposite of this “good girl” aspect so that I could experience empathizing with her (my shadow self).

I now clearly SEE you shadow aspects, and I fully embrace and integrate you into whole self. Let us merge as One, Be an amazing team, and fully enjoy the rest of Life together. I love you.

The Very Anxious Anti-Mind Man

In August of 2019—during the last hike of Victor Oddo’s retreat in Sedona—I had an opportunity to experience a glaring and helpful gift of contrast.

While a small group of us were taking a break, due to the scorching hot sun, a tall, skinny, older Caucasian man—who appeared to be in his mid to late sixties—approached us and started sharing information at a rapid rate, like an energizer bunny on crack.

He went off ranting about the mind being bad and evil, and that we must only follow our hearts; and this continued for about 15 minutes or so.

At one point, I calmly and assertively shared something to the effect that, whenever we label and judge any aspect of ourselves—like the neutral mind that can be used in highly beneficial ways—we not only become trapped in separation consciousness, but we also make it difficult to unconditionally love all aspects of our whole self.

And when our cup isn’t full, we’re unable to truly and generously give to others. I also added that the mind and heart work best as a team, not separate.

Though the old fart seemed to briefly think about what I had said, continued the same rant, and then ended his mostly one-way conversation by handing us a red rock shaped as a heart.

I ended up giving the heart rock that I received to my very logical, yet, very thoughtful roommate (from this retreat), who decided to head back from the hike earlier, and wait in the vehicle at the parking lot until we all returned.

I followed my heart’s guidance and my brain’s logic; it not only made sense to pass this gift to her—with the intention to help balance her masculine and feminine energies within—but it also FELT light/right to my heart.

When everyone was about to head back from the hike, we found out from Victor and his crew that they’ve seen this older man do his thing at Sedona hiking areas.

Insight Inserted on 4/30/20: 

When I expand my perspective, I realize that the above mentioned old man was mirroring to me (at the time) the “negative” unknown/shadow aspects of whole self—that’s been repressed since childhood and suppressed during adulthood (due to society’s disapproval of such “wrong” or “bad” aspects)—who only wanted to:

• fully honor the heart, since it hadn’t been for way too long throughout the patriarchal years (millenniums), not remembering (as a soul) that it’s not about the heart against the mind (and vice versa), but the merging of the two into One whole.
• completely dedicate self to spreading important, highly beneficial information, not remembering that doing so in a very anxious and aggressive manner often pushes others away.

I now clearly SEE you shadow aspects, and I fully embrace and integrate you into whole self. Let us merge as One, Be an amazing team, and fully enjoy the rest of Life together. I love you.

Recruiters of Limiting Beliefs: Hard-Core, Non-Pushy & Clever/Subtle

It was crystal clear that the old man believed he was on a mission, which is fine since every soul has the right to pursue whatever they’re passionate about.

But his very anxious energy/vibrational frequency reminded me of some of the hard-core, recruiting Christians (usually Koreans), Catholics, and Jehovah’s Witnesses.

Granted, sometime between 2011 and 2015—while living at our house in San Antonio, TX—I did meet two ladies of Jehovah’s Witnesses, who rang my doorbell, weren’t pushy, and seemed genuine if their spread of unconditional love.

One of our elderly neighbors from Helotes, TX, wasn’t that pushy either, though she was pretty clever in indirectly and very briefly inserting her beliefs into casual conversations.

Insight Inserted on 5/5/20: 

When I expand my perspective, I realize that the above mentioned “recruiters”  were mirroring to me (at the time) the “negative” unknown/shadow aspects of whole self—that’s been repressed since childhood and suppressed during adulthood (due to society’s disapproval of such “wrong” or “bad” aspects)—who only:

• wanted to help others to reconnect with their higher power, and live better lives, not remembering (as a Soul) that others don’t need rescuing, and that it actually benefits others by giving them space, respecting their boundaries and beliefs, and allowing them to simply Be on their own, unique soul journey, at their own pace, and contributing in their own way to their individual and collective consciousness.

I now clearly SEE you shadow aspect, and I fully embrace and integrate you into whole self. Let us merge as One, Be an amazing team, and fully enjoy the rest of Life together. I love you.

Introducing the Overly Logical to the Merging of Science & Spirituality

I also wondered if people like the energizer bunny man have contributed (over the decades) to creating a belief that people from Sedona who are into spirituality are woo woo.

While working at my last job in Sedona (a spiritual company), I had conversations over the phone with many skeptical, overly logical people (and some, often older men, that could be perceived as very intimidating).

However, I felt comfortable talking to all of them because I simply trusted Spirit within that I would share whatever information, knowledge, profound wisdom, insights, ideas, suggestions, etc. that would be beneficial; and if I didn’t know the answer, I would find a way to obtain it for them.

And I gave them examples of how there’s been an increase of science backing up spirituality over the years, to include introducing them to the gist of quantum physics entanglement—related to the interconnectedness of Life within our world and way beyond—and great soul teachers like Gregg Braden and Dr. Bruce Lipton, who do an outstanding job of merging science and spirituality (an example is the reading mentioned on top of the this post, “Mysteries of the Human Heart“).

To my great surprise, after our conversation, many of these once skeptical people became interested in scheduling an angel guide appointment (who in turn could schedule them a spiritual retreat, if they were still interested).

Granted, I did experience one phone conversation that wasn’t pleasant while working there.

One old woman went off on me for trying to help her navigate her computer, to the best of my ability, though she made it very difficult because she kept clicking various links on her own, and then getting frustrated because I couldn’t see from my end what was going on.

It seemed like no amount of unconditional kindness, patience, tact, understanding, compassion, gentleness, helped this situation.

So I simply let it go and allowed her to rant, until she was done blaming me for her incompetence.

At the end of the conversation, she shouted, “Your manager, and the owner, should’ve never hired someone like you!” (which I silently disagreed with since there were those, to include the elderly, who expressed their sincere appreciation for my assistance, to include asking if I was an Angel Guide, Master Practitioner, owner of the company, or healer).

To my great surprise, my manager stood up for me when the old bat tried to complain about me, since the manager had recently experienced a similar situation with another difficult person who called.

Insight Inserted on 5/5/20: 

When I expand my perspective, I realize that the above mentioned overly skeptical folks, along with the seemingly “no logic” elderly woman, were mirroring to me (at the time) the “negative” unknown/shadow aspects of whole self—that’s been repressed since childhood and suppressed during adulthood (due to society’s disapproval of such “wrong” or “bad” aspects)—who only:

• wanted to better understand the intuitive side of our whole self, and remembering (as a Soul) that one just needs to further open one’s mind and heart, and be open to receiving beneficial information that can expand one’s individual and collective consciousness
• wanted to better understand the logical side of our whole self, to include technology, not remembering (as a Soul) that it’s not necessary to be so defensive and mean. One can simply choose to be a better listener, have more patience, and incorporate some kindness into the conversation, in order to make the communication more effective, and be able to find solutions together.

I now clearly SEE you shadow aspects, and I fully embrace and integrate you into whole self. Let us merge as One, Be an amazing team, and fully enjoy the rest of Life together. I love you.

Deep Thoughts About Old Farts

I realize that old folks (but not all) can be very challenging to interact with at times, especially if they’re narrow-minded, closed-hearted, set in their outdated fear-based ways, and very stubborn.

But I take from such experiences the GIFTS of CONTRAST/DUALITY/POLARITY, which helps me to deeply appreciate the opposites, like profoundly wise people within the elderly population.

And I’ve been blessed to cross paths with a few number of them, to include within Sedona.

I’ve shared this within this blog (though I don’t recall what post), but an older gentleman (probably in his mid to late sixties) approached me at a Sedona brewery pub twice—after I performed open-mic comedy once, and open-mic poetry another time—and shared his sincere compliments and profound words of wisdom.

I felt so grateful and thanked him, and even included him in a review I wrote for this place.

Insight Inserted on 5/5/20: 

When I expand my perspective, I realize that the above mentioned elderly folks (stubborn or wise) were mirroring to me the “negative” unknown/shadow aspects of whole self—that’s been repressed since childhood and suppressed during adulthood (due to society’s disapproval of such “wrong” or “bad” aspects)—and the “positive” (golden) shadow aspects of whole self who only:

• wanted to remain in their comfort zone, where it felt safe, not remembering (as a Soul) that changes in Life can be highly beneficial as well, and even the so-called “negative” changes only appear so from a limited, human perspective. From Spirit’s multidimensional perspective, EVERYTHING that happens ultimately occurs for the highest benefit of interconnected Life (All That Is); and being able to REALIZE (with clarity) this Truth is Divine Wisdom.
• wanted to generously share their wisdom they’ve gathered throughout their lives, intuitively knowing that what benefits another, benefits self, and vice versa.

I now clearly SEE you shadow aspects, and I fully embrace and integrate you into whole self. Let us merge as One, Be an amazing team, and fully enjoy the rest of Life together. I love you.

Rainbow Bridge Soul Teachers

Another example of someone who aged gracefully as a very wise human being—and whom I’d like to emulate when I become an older fart—is one of the elderly women who also worked at the spiritual company of my last job in Sedona who did beautiful, soul portrait artwork for clients.

There were certain spiritual, Master Practitioners who refused to come by our office since they believed the energies were too dark and negative—mainly due to my very aggressive, negative, gossipy, manager at the time who had been there for over four years (stories shared in the recent Sedona post series, where the manager was fired due to me sharing some truths).

This baffled me, as briefly shared within this year’s Sedona post series, because 1) Master Practitioners within this company are also known to be Master Healers (according to its website), and 2) I have no doubt that true spirituality is the practice of LIVING the merged Light & Unconditional Love (to the best of our ability), in the real world where not everything is puffy white clouds, rainbow-colored unicorns, and…you get the picture. 

However, unlike certain, fearful Master Practitioners, this elderly lady was SO STRONG and BOLD in her grounded spirituality within her, that she didn’t allow any negative energies to negatively affect her.

Why? Because I trust that when we’re able to maintain a very high, vibrational frequency, it’s so powerful, that our mere full presence can effortlessly transmute (raise) the surrounding vibrations of the lower/dense/fear-based energies. 

Rain or shine, whenever Wendybyrd (Sedona name) stopped by our office (sometimes with treats), she was like radiating, bright sunshine—with her powerful full presence, amazing sense of humor, smiles, crazyass lovable loud laughter, profound insights, interesting stories, and so much unconditional love for everyone (even to our cranky manager, who also has positive qualities by the way, like all other souls, as shared within the post series).

I also highly respect and admire other wise souls, to include Spiritual teachers, who are very good at being a rainbow bridge between the material and spiritual worlds, rather than being overly logical (left-brain) or overly spiritual (right brain); they remind me of grounded spiritual Beings.

Some examples are Abraham-Hicks (though more spiritual), Teal Swan, Lee Harris, Victor Oddo (though more physical realm), and Sadhguru (though more spiritual).

Insight Inserted on 5/5/20: 

When I expand my perspective, I realize that the above mentioned elderly women (both negative and positive) were mirroring to me the “negative” unknown/shadow aspects of whole self—that’s been repressed since childhood and suppressed during adulthood (due to society’s disapproval of such “wrong” or “bad” aspects)—and the “positive” (golden) shadow aspects of whole self who only:

• wanted to be present in positive environments, because it felt better and safer, not remembering (as Souls) that they have enormous power from within—merged Light (God) and Unconditional Love (Goddess) frequencies—and had they had the heart’s desire and willingness to Be in alignment with their Source within, they would’ve be able to transmute any lower/dense/negative energies around them into higher vibrations; hence, contributing to the expansion of the collective spiritual evolution.
• wanted to generously share with interconnected others the overflowing, Divine Goddess/Unconditional Love energies

I now clearly SEE you shadow aspects, and I fully embrace and integrate you into whole self. Let us merge as One, Be an amazing team, and fully enjoy the rest of Life together. I love you.

Readings Created From: Half-Ass, Don’t Give a Rat’s Ass, or Integrated Mind/Heart

Yesterday, I sent a message to the creator of this online course that I’m currently taking, via her website, that’s meant to activate and/or enhance intuitive and psychic abilities.

One of the videos—that’s meant to be watched after reading its matching chapter—had subtle background noise (someone talking) while the creator of the course was talking, which it made it disruptive.

It also kept pausing every 30 seconds or so, which was another pain in the ass.

So when I sent this message to her—just in case she wasn’t aware of it—I also mentioned that her course is pretty helpful, and I thanked her for that.

But I added that she might want to consider doing a spell check and grammar check before publishing her next course (if she plans to), since I’ve come upon bumps within both the schedule and the manual as well.

I basically explained that I get that within the spiritual community, there are those who may believe that doing things like spell check and grammar check isn’t a big deal since it has to do with the function of the logical mind, but that one too many errors can really interrupt the flow of experiencing a smooth and enjoyable reading process.

I also shared with her that I trust that the mind and heart can work great as a team.

After sending her the message, I gave the video another shot, and then moved on since it was wasting my time.

I would prefer looking forward to an online course that I already paid for, and was initially excited about, but if frustration ends up outweighing the helpful information, then it will be time to say thank you and farewell (without any refund).

Years ago, I briefly checked out introductions for certain spiritual books, and even e-books.

And though there were plenty of well-written books that shared helpful knowledge and wisdom (and even profound wisdom), there were those books that weren’t easy on the eyes to read.

One author didn’t use any space in-between paragraphs, so every page of the book was full of words crammed from the top to bottom, to include run on sentences.

It was apparent that he didn’t even do a spell check, or grammar check, before publishing the book, which made it even more unpleasant to read, though he had some great information, insights, and wisdom to share as a spiritual teacher and You Tuber.

In one of his videos, he talked about how he loves to just go with the flow, and not worry about any logical details of the mind; and his unprofessional book reflected his limiting belief.

I discontinued watching him afterwards, because his teachings no longer felt right/light/true to me.

Now I’m not saying that we should all be unhealthy perfectionists and not make any mistakes.

God knows how many I’ve made, and I’m still learning to improve on my own writing (and I will continue to check for errors within this post tomorrow, and also add insights).

Mistakes happen, and it’s perfectly okay; however COMMA when we don’t give a rat’s ass, or we’re half-assing, whatever we’re typing (especially as a published book)—“because it’s channeled message that’s freely flowing through me”—we shouldn’t be shocked when our book sales don’t do so hot.

I’ve read channeled messages within books, to include the ones from the well-known author, Barbara Marciniak, who channels the Pleiadians—as well as the ladies who channeled the Arcturians in the book, We, The Arcturians—and guess what?

Yeah, they initially went with the flow and channeled the messages, but then they went back and used their integrated Mind/Heart to create a professional book that’s very pleasant, mind-blowing, intriguing, and captivating to read.

So YES it’s possible to use both hemispheres of our whole brains/the Divine Masculine and Divine Feminine energies within and around our whole, Multidimensional self/Self.

Insight Inserted on 5/5/20: 

When I expand my perspective, I realize that the above mentioned, more right-brain writers, along with the balanced brain writers, were mirroring to me the “negative” unknown/shadow aspects of whole self—that’s been repressed since childhood and suppressed during adulthood (due to society’s disapproval of such “wrong” or “bad” aspects)—and the “positive” (golden) shadow aspects of whole self who only:

• wanted to freely and fully express what’s been inspired from within, without having to be interrupted with the need to fix any human errors, not remembering (as a Soul) that it can be helpful to others when we combine the abilities, skills, and talents of our mind and heart to express with clarity.
  • While making recent references to certain, past posts within this blog, I noticed that there have been times where I, too, typed away without regard to adding spaces, and doing a grammar and/or spell check. 
• wanted to strive for excellence, and convey as clearly as possible the expressions that’s been inspired from within

I now clearly SEE you shadow aspects, and I fully embrace and integrate you into whole self. Let us merge as One, Be an amazing team, and fully enjoy the rest of Life together. I love you.

Highly Beneficial Books I Look Forward to Reading

Once I read the books I already bought earlier this year—from Vicki Howie after my first and last session with her—I plan on buying other books that I’ve been strongly drawn to since I highly resonate with their teachings.

I trust they will be highly beneficial, to include but not limited to: Bashar’s new book, as well as most of Teal Swan’s; Abraham-Hicks’, Gregg Braden’s, and Dr. Bruce Lipton’s; other Zecharia Sitchin books, further channelings from the Arcturians (that I deeply FEEL since not all channelings are from the same high, vibrational frequencies), Sadhguru’s, and others (I saved a list of images of their books) .

I also trust that Victor Oddo will do an outstanding job creating and publishing his future, first book as well; as will I in Divine perfect timing and order.

By the way, I often use the word ass within my blog, but I was inspired by Teal’s video to express within this sub-title.

I left the following comment for her most recent YouTube video, “THE Success Factor | Never Half Ass Anything!“:

Muchas grassy@$$ Teal for this helpful video! You are deeply appreciated for your precious existence, full presence, and invaluable gifts of YOU that you share with humanity and way beyond. You look happy as well, which is awesome. 😉

Why Am I Investing in This Seemingly Invisible Blog?

Some people have wondered—even though they may not directly express this—why I invest a lot of time and energy into this blog, that seems practically invisible, unimportant, and uninteresting in this world, especially where social media, reality TV shows, sports, celebrities, politics, mukbangs, etc. are what catches the majority of humanity’s attention these days. 

Side Note: Granted, I respect and admire Hamzy’s BOLD, Korean gangsta-like, “I don’t give a $h!+ who’s watching” attitude, that I’d love to integrate into my whole self if I’m still interested in creating my own You Tube channel in the future; plus, this empowering attitude would be helpful for open-mic comedy performances as well.

Her channel is Real Mukbang Hamzy, which I enjoy watching whenever I miss certain Korean foods that I love, that I don’t have access to nearby.

[Update 7/19/2020: I’m grateful for the life lesson that mukbangs, in general, have mirrored to me; and this contrast has helped me to more deeply appreciate the savoring of food and drinks in moderation, rather than eating and drinking large quantities in a compulsive manner—what I used to do during high school—since it’s more about quality than quantity. But I can understand why interconnected others choose to do this, to include wanting attention, acceptance, and approval from others, stress relief, desiring to be stimulated by an external source, emotional eating, wanting to feel alive, food and/or drink addiction, and/or wanting to make more money (in order to survive), as Hamzy mentioned about the latter reason in one of her videos. See post, “Life Lessons from Observing Korean Mukbangs“]

Though she eats more than the average female, she doesn’t go WAY overboard—like the typical mukbangs that I very briefly checked out due to curiosity—to include eating servings like six bowls of noodles, plus other meals, in one seating.

This is riDONKulous and sad, because even though they may start out enjoying the food, at a certain point, you can tell that they’re basically forcing themselves to eat for the audience.

I shared a comment for a young girl who said she didn’t like eating six bowls of jjanjangmyeon, but she was doing so anyway.

So I basically asked her (via a comment) why she even bothers then. I also suggested to her, why not be and do what she truly enjoys since no one’s forcing her to eat so much.

Deep down, I intuitively know that it’s highly beneficial for self/interconnected Life within this world and way beyond, to fully express and share my personal experiences, despite outer appearances (that it may not matter), as well as my own doubts at times.

And it’s not because I think I’m ‘all that and a bag of chips’, or that I only have positive stories to share; but because I’m often willing to share much of my entire self—the so-called right and wrong, good and bad, light and dark, etc.—which I trust leads to profound integration and transformation, and unconditional love of ALL neutral aspects and extensions of whole self/Self (which helps us to truly and fully embrace interconnected Life).

And I’ve let go of the concerns and worries about not being able to make a living off of one of the main creative hobbies that I truly love doing (and time flies whenever I’m blogging, which is another sign that it highly resonates with me).

I used to incorporate ads into this blog via Google Adsense—that helped make less than a $100 within a few years or so—but when they sent me the third email (over the years) of not approving something that I had blogged about, without even informing me of the specifics, I let them go.

They sent an email stating that they’ll send me my money in three months or so; but they can keep the less than $100 if they want, because I won’t lose any sleep over it. 

I’ve been practicing more than ever before to give myself more freedom, in all areas of my life, which is liberating and empowering. One magical day, I will master it.

Granted, I do intend to make money via other creations in the future, like: I deleted the list since I need to stop talking about it, and just do it, or continue doing it.

For now, I trust in the flowing abundance in its various forms (and non-forms), which is ultimately from the Universe within.

And though I may not be noticed, seen, accepted, recognized, embraced, and/or appreciated by this world, I fully trust and deeply appreciate all the messages from my inner world (shared the various aspects and extensions of Expanded Self in category page, Earthly and Otherworldly Puzzle Pieces); and that’s more than enough for now.

And whenever I go through phases of seemingly NOT experiencing Divine synchronicity—as though I’ve been cut off from all communication with my earthly and otherworldly Higher Selves—I’ve been reminding self that I’ve been given the golden opportunity to be at peace with not needing inner and outer reassurances (a great reminder that I’ve learned from Victor Oddo in one of his You Tube videos).

I’ve also been practicing giving various forms of unconditional love to self (which I feel is the most powerful), to include but not limited to: self-care, treating self, pampering self, self-compassion, self-encouragement, self-upliftment, self-empowerment, self-confidence, and self-inspiration.

Perhaps in Divine perfect timing and order, even long after I pass from this lifetime, some of the beneficial recordings—to include Light & Unconditional Love frequencies—will touch the hearts of more souls. Since we’re all interconnected, what benefits one, benefits another, and vice versa.

Miraculously, I’ve reached a point in my life that even if this blog were to completely vanish one day, I would be able to let go of it—just the way I’ve been able to let go of so much over the decades.

Granted, the old me would’ve felt a great loss since I had invested sharing so much within this blog for almost a decade.

Even if my precious, adult children (from my first marriage), and my current, second husband, ever wanted to end our relationship, I’d embrace their decisions and continue to love them unconditionally from afar (the way I do with my mother and Korean relatives in Korea), whereas the old me would’ve been devastated.

When I reached the state mentioned right above, I realized that MAJOR CHANGES/TRANSFORMATIONS are definitely taking place in my life.

I noticed that whenever I’m in alignment with Spirit within, I’m ready to further embrace any other “loss” in my life that my physical human ego self once desperately believed I couldn’t live without.

And I develop a stronger trust, and builder more confidence, that whatever leaves my life no longer serves me/benefits me/makes me happy; and the exiting of the old makes room for the amazing NEW way of Being and NEW Life.