Image by Aurélien MAILLET from Pixabay
This post is part of the post series:
- “Sharing Freely & Making Money, Helping vs Rescue Mode & Limiting Side of Consciousness Levels”
- “The Divine Masculine/God Essence in Various Forms & Dream on New Moon Day: Insects, Bugs & Translucent, Violet Snake Head Coming Out of a Cup” (most recent)
Yesterday, I wrote the paragraph below in post, “Sharing Freely & Making Money, Helping vs Rescue Mode & Limiting Side of Consciousness Levels”:
And last but not least, ultimately, what matters most, is that highly beneficial message(s) are shared with as many interconnected Souls as possible, even if it means from others (but NOT in a twisted, misrepresented, misinformed, and/or disinformed, fear-based way that’s: toxic, corrupt, unhealthy, non-beneficial, recruiting, controlling, forced and/or manipulative).
And this morning, it occurred to me that I, too, have been most of these aspects at times, though not habitually (like negative, judgmental, critical, unhealthy non-beneficial, manipulative, possible providing inaccurate information, recruiting, and toxic due to being stuck in negativity).
[UPDATE for the above paragraph: healing and integrating Relationship Mirror #2—out of the 7 Essene Mirrors (eloquently and gracefully taught by Gregg Braden in 2 hour worthwhile, invaluable, MAJOR GAME-CHANGING YouTube video)—that which we judge in others/self]
I then wondered if this blog is more harmful than it is beneficial.
[UPDATE for the above paragraph: healing and integrating Relationship Mirror #7—out of the 7 Essene Mirrors—EVERYTHING is perfect AS IS (aka Divine Wisdom]—despite the limited human perspective of temporary outer appearances and circumstances—until we measure against an external yard stick.
Example #1: If I happened to believe that I may be the only human left on plant Earth—similar to the movie, “I AM Legend” with Will Smith—then I would still freely, fully, and authentically express ALL aspects of myself.
I would also share via a public, online blog—JUST in case there are others out there (and some of the contents may be helpful to them)—without feeling the need to judge myself, since there would be NO external yard stick to (compare) and measure myself against.
Example #2: We are all WORTHY, a Spirit & Soul’s Divine Birthright, until we are conditioned by mostly fear-based societies/worlds to believe that we’re not.
We are ultimately all Souls/Masters who are still completely “asleep” in physical human form, in the process of waking up—especially after experiencing the 11:11 Souls’ ACTIVATION CODE—or WOKEN 👁️👀 in this Earth 🌏🌎🌍 School & Cosmic PLAYground]
And if it’s the former, then it’s best that I no longer share it publicly; hence, this will be my last post, that will be up for today only.
However, IF this blog is more beneficial than not, I may (depending how I feel) focus my energy and time on projects that take the most helpful and beneficial parts, and create a course(s), book(s), and/or transformation cards (as intended in the past).
It also occurred to me that it was more than likely my ego that wanted to believe that this blog was helpful to others, when the truth is, it continues to be practical invisible in this world (probably for a good reason).
I also realized that blogging for 13 years appears to not have improved myself and my life as much as I would’ve loved to believe.
And from a neutral perspective, I think this entire life journey has transformed me into a much more careLESS and hopeless, slowly dying essence within a practically empty shell of a physical body.
[UPDATE for the above paragraph: healing and integrating Relationship Mirror #6–out of the 7 Essene Mirrors—“The Dark Night of the Soul.” Further insights and updates later.
The following screenshot is from Gregg’s workshop video mentioned above (Also, I recently came upon further helpful Information/Light 🕯️about The 7 Essene Mirrors written by Rosie Dodd via Medium (there’s also an app), who eloquently shared much insights, examples, and profound wisdom, with grace, as well):
I had been informed sometime this year that my adult daughter hates me (don’t blame her; used to be sad, but no longer, simply embraced).
But I will always love her nonetheless, as well as the rest of my loved ones.
My adult son is a hardcore Christian, and I used to be concerned, but no longer, just embraced, because he’s increasingly Being an unconditionally loving Soul (first and foremost)/Christian, that’s seemingly very rare—a true follower of Jesus’ Heart-based teachings.
I’ve only known two Christians throughout my life who seemed to habitually Be and represent Living Wisdom (and not just the easy talk, to include preaching Bible quotes, that has never impressed me).
And this was within a decade of exploring various denominations of Christianity (to include the Catholic Church) in my late teens through late twenties.
And these unforgettable Souls were Mr. Langholz—my pure-hearted, deeply compassionate, and humorous, Anatomy & Physiology, high school teacher —and his gentle-kind, graceful wife, whom I’ve written about in the awe-inspiring Souls post, that also includes like-Hearted others.
The truth is, as of now, I love the idea of further releasing more layers of earthly labels, to include whatever remnants of beliefs that I had collected from this world, that led me to to believe who I need to be (or not), and what all I need to believe, think, feel, behave, say and do…or not.
It feels liberating to embrace being a nobody, not being needed by anybody, and no longer caring so deeply about so many things that don’t matter, that only cause a great amount of unnecessary stress at times.
As the days, months, years, decades, lifetimes go by—lifetimes remembered through many earthly and otherworldly dreams since 2001–I noticed that this world seems to be getting worse and worse—the habitually (keyword):
shallow, fake, drama-stirring, robotic, deceptive, aggressive, passive-aggressive, manipulative, controlling, unloving, major pain in the ass, abusive (mentally, emotionally, physically, and spiritually), cruel, and especially the corrupt being the rapidly increasing majority and the norm.
[UPDATE: The above paragraph: Essene Mirror #2 of that which I still judge to varying degrees; hence, they continue to trigger me. However, when I go deep within, I realize that I, too, can be any of ultimately ALL neutral aspects, during many lifetimes]
And regardless of what these repeating aspects mirror to me—more than likely mirror #2 of judgment, and mirror #5 of mother/father, within The 7 Essene Mirrors—I cannot deny what continues to drain me, exhaust me, and even disgust me.
Because the truth is, our emotions are an authentic, inner compass, that reveals exactly how we truly feel about whoever and whatever.
Here are just 3, undeniable examples:
Example #1:
Recall a food that would make you want to instantly vomit 🤢🤮 as soon as you put some in your mouth.
For me, the top of the list would be something moving.
Example #2:
You can take the most positive, unconditionally loving and/or enlightened human being, and tell them to spend an extended amount of time (perhaps a week) in a large porta potty that’s filled with an abundance of dark urine and mushy feces that’s been marinating in the scorching hot sun for days.
Even s/he will experience the emotion of disgust since it’s a part of being human to be naturally repulsed by what INTENSELY bothers their perception.
The porta potty is ultimately not negative, wrong, bad or evil—it’s simply exists to help humanity—but it’s still disgusting nonetheless.
And to pretend, even for a moment, that a porta potty delightfully smells like a field of fresh roses, would be a MEGA LOAD of doo doo.
Example #3:
If any of us with a pulse, were to personally witness an innocent, sentient being (like a baby) being brutally tortured, I guarantee you, that even a high-on-his-horse monk, guru, pastor, priest, nun, bodhisattva, etc. will feel a negative emotion deep down, despite stating fancy spiritual words about non-judgment, compassion, unconditional forgiveness, neutrality, peace, freedom, Unity Consciousness, and other love-based words.
I recently experienced a series of Divine Synchronicity that started with a photo that popped up on the TV screen of a huge, submerged, humpback whale.
S/he appeared to be looking right at me with its deeply sad eye.
As I followed my inner guidance—and matching outer signs of synchronicity—the breadcrumbs led me to a video that I didn’t even know existed for over a decade, which baffled me.
How is it that I had tuned into the documentary, Black Fish, that I became very passionate about—and even wrote blog posts and created social media posters (when I was participating in a few social media platforms)—but didn’t tune into The Cove?
Plus, there were other related videos of immense cruelty towards various types of cetaceans within certain countries (and not just the well-known asshole whale hunters and certain politicians of Japan, who have used the excuse of scientific research as a cover up).
What those cruel humans—regardless of country and race—did to those dolphins 🐬 (and probably continue to do), to include stabbing them repeatedly while they were trapped and panicking, and even harming baby dolphins, made me feel various, negative thoughts and emotions.
I think I first experienced some degree of disbelief and shock, followed by deep sadness, and then anger, rage, and then CALM (after the storm).
Since the present, past, and future are ultimately happening simultaneously in the NOW—though from a human linear perspective they are all one after another—I realized it’s not too late to intervene and creatively PLAY.
I imagined and visualized a powerful, protective, gold, energy force field surrounding these dolphins (Soul Families), and other cetaceans who were hunted and brutally killed.
And all the people who stabbed them—at any past/present/future moment—would end up instantly and automatically stabbing themselves repeatedly, but not dying yet, so that they can share their baffling experiences with others (and so that they experience what it FEELS like on the receiving end).
I even imagined and visualized INTENSE TSUNAMIS and MEGA WHIRLPOOLS OBLITERATING all ships that hunt, harm, and torture Water Beings like cetaceans.
Part of this particular series of synchronicity also includes having selected the oracle cards “Water Goddess” and then “Grace” (of a Black Female Mermaid)—Mystic Art Medicine Cards created by Cher Lyn—soon after witnessing the horrible side of these humans.
I had also selected the Light Language card, “ORION RELEASING: SELF HATRED” from the Cosmic Consciousness Ascension Deck created by Jamye Price from Sedona, AZ.
If I had done such terrible and hurtful things in any past life (harming, torturing, and killing innocent creatures such as cetaceans, to include 🐋 🐬🐳)—hence, these aspects were still mirrors that trigged me—then it would make sense that I could use all the help I can receive to unconditionally forgive myself/others, which seems impossible to do at times.
It can be extremely challenging not to be disgusted with, and even passionately hate some humans, to include the self/Self at times.
For instance, the last time I visited my mother due to someone’s “white lie” that her stroke was getting worse, I experienced for the first time something that I didn’t think was in me, and that the old version of self would take with me to the grave.
My mother was extremely narcissistic (as usual), and so mean daily to everyone—ensuring she stressed out all family members.
As much as I confronted her—even matching her aggressive energies at times, in order for her to back the F#%! off (since assertive communication didn’t work)—she just kept being her usual ways; and even other relatives joined in later, maintaining healthier boundaries.
About a month or so—after her recovering from her sudden stroke symptoms again, as well as mild heart and liver issues (but continuing to be an ass)—I just wanted to place a pillow over her face while she was sleeping, and finally END HER permanent misery (as well all the misery she caused others).
I was silently shouting, “Just DIE already!!! Do humanity a favor. Everyone will be relieved, and no one will miss you, not even me anymore. GUARANTEED.”
And this is true, because even while she was hospitalized for a week—while still bitching and moaning about everything—there was an indirect, gentle conversation among all family members (my Korean relatives) that we would all fully embrace her death should it happen while she was in the hospital.
The murderer aspect within me—that exists with ALL of us to varying degrees (yes, even killing tiny insects and bugs since it’s NOT about the size of Life)—wanted to take action, that I could probably get away with, but I refrained.
Whether it was my ego aspect of self and/or Higher Self, simply put…it was SELF.
It’s WAY TOO EASY for any of us to say things like, “How could you even think such things? 🫢🫣 I can NEVER be ______ or ______ (whatever negative aspects).
But I have no doubt, that those are the times that we have the darkest skeletons in our closets, that’s hidden behind various “only good” person masks.
Negative emotions can be beneficial at times, but they’re not meant to take over the entire ship in out of control ways (our Divine Self is the Captain of our WHOLE Self/self).
But they will, if we habitually don’t acknowledge, deny, ignore and suppress our authentic emotions and true feelings, which can even cause one to go postal (an extreme example, like school shootings).
Another common example: we can feel like slapping or punching someone, or better yet, kicking them in the balls; but that doesn’t mean it’s a good idea to take action.
I did my best my entire life to have compassion for my mother, unconditionally forgive her many times, for all the known and even imagined childhood through adulthood traumas that she had experienced.
But at some point, there needs to be noticeable change for the better, FOR THE LOVE OF GODDESS (which I told her, the latter part about her not having changed after 50 years).
The morning I left, she cried (genuinely) and promised to change her ways—something I had never seen or heard her say before—but I told her to only do so for herself, and no one else, not even for me.
Because her intense, unpleasant presence has at least been ongoing for 50 years, but probably all her life of 83 years.
One of my aunts—whom my grandmother had unofficially adoptive decades ago (whom my mom lives with)—said that my mom will never change.
And I sensed that it’s probably true, though I suppose anything’s possible in the Quantum Field of Unlimited Possibilities.
I’m fully ready for my mother—and everyone similar to her (even if that includes me)—to leave this planet.
I wish for all hopeless people to experience deep healing and transformation somewhere else, rather than continue to make this world a worst place.
Anyhoo, regarding the dolphins and other cetaceans, there are some working solutions, to include from the website, Ric O’Barry’s Dolphin Project.(⬅️ click on title to open in another window).
You can take the pledge NOT to buy a ticket to a dolphin show, which I did (Ric’s heartfelt explanation at bottom of post).
If any of these ongoing aspects are continuing to mirror to me who I am in the present moment—what core, vibrational frequency I habitually radiate out—then it’s time for me to be taken out of the Cosmic equation.
Because all the BULLshit of this world and the majority of humanity has been getting VERY OLD, OUTDATED,AND IMMENSELY BORING, especially with the never-ending inner and outer world CONFLICTS, BATTLES, AND WARS.
I’m not sure anymore if this world will noticeably improve.
I don’t know why, but yesterday, I dreamt of being within a bright green canyon area on a sunny day, where I excitedly asked (to whoever was with me) if we we were surrounded by malachite.
Immediately afterwards, I noticed what initially appeared to be a colorful and vivid shrine of Goddess Hathor’s head, and a cow, that I think was mostly turquoise, white, and gold colors.
I felt deeply moved, but then noticed that the shrine turned into a store full of swim gear, to include goggles.
And then I noticed an entire row of stores. And that’s all I recall.
As usual, I asked Spirit/Goddess for any insights t what this dream message means; and I also looked up Dream interpretations of key words as usual.
I trust I’ll know whatever I need to know whenever I need to know it (that Bashar—channeled via Darryl Anka—had taught).
UPDATE added next day, 11/19/2023 (Sunday):
While reviewing some excerpts and insights I had shared a while back, from Thunder Perfect Mind—within this blog’s category page, “AM I : I AM”—and then being drawn to the top in order to find a post, I came upon the following section, that instantly reminded me of the dream about Goddess Hathor’s shrine.
^^^^BEGINNING OF EXCERPT^^^^^^^^
UPDATE on top of this page added on 4/6/2021
Hathor am I, and to my beauty drawn
All glories of the Universe bow down,
The blossom and the mountain and the dawn.
Fruit’s blush, and woman, our creation’s crown.
I am the priest, the sacrifice, the shrine,
I am the love and life of the divine!
Life, death, love, hatred, light, darkness, are surely mine—
Are mine.
While following my inner guidance—that started with a dream analysis this morning—I came upon the above reading, “HATHOR, THE TURQUOISE GODDESS” that shared an excerpt from a poetic work that stated the below paragraph (which preceded the quote above):
The goddess Hathor appears sporadically throughout the works of Crowley where she is usually seen as either a solar deity or as the Egyptian equivalent of Venus or Aphrodite.
In Crowley’s poetic work, Tannhauser, she is one of the characters that is of the “World of the Gods.”
Therein she has merely one line: “Light, Truth, arise, arise!” In this work she is seen as being synonymous with Aphrodite and Mary.
Related to the name “Mary” above: The following is an excerpt from the post, “A Bizarre and Unforgettable First Breathwork Experience” (and a family friend is named Mary, whom I’ve known for over about 20 years:)
As I’ve shared before—in one of last month’s (May 2021) posts (I’m pretty sure)—I had a very unusual experience at work one day, where the main theme seemed to be The Divine Feminine Goddess essence and authentic Full Presence.
In a nutshell, since I’ve already shared the story, multiple women customers named Mary showed up all within the first half of the afternoon.
Following that, I crossed paths with two other women whose full presence—along with soulful, deep eye contact and the sharing of unconditional kindness and profound wisdom—felt unlike most women I’ve met in almost five decades of my life. […]
^^^^^^^^^^END OF EXCERPTS^^^^^^^^^^^^
I also asked Goddess Hathor-Sekhmet for a CRYSTAL CLEAR answer to what is beneficial regarding this blog.
And I thanked her ahead of time, the way I’ve done with all requests, prayers, non-requests, demands and commands to various extensions of Higher Selves & Highest Self.
I’ve dreamt of Goddess Hathor-Sekhmet, or Goddess Sekhmet-Hathor, many times in Her various forms, to include the white cow, white snake, tigress, lioness, black cat, feminine figure that contained what appeared to be the Universe of pitch black night and many colorful stars, a faceless and naked female pregnant with a cube belly, other Divine Feminine forms (to include Goddess Inanna & Isis), and even hearing Her voices (to include hearing Her sing in Egypt in the middle of the dark morning, on the Nike River).
But, this is the first time that I had ever seen Goddess Hathor’s face in a dream.
And I still don’t know what to do with all of this information, though I’ve simply been doing my best to Be:
integrating many aspects of WHOLE self/Self, authentic, honest, grateful, deeply appreciative, inner and outer peace, inner and outer freedom, learning, growing, gaining wisdom, mastering abilities, creative, sharing Light, and unconditionally accepting, embracing, and even deeply loving interconnected Life of many worlds (including ones in dream state; the latter of which is extremely challenging to do at times, especially in Earth realities).
I suppose the best I can do for now is record the dream—with discernment (and not too much or everything)—-what I recall to the best of my ability.
After all, it can be overwhelming IF I overthink and over feel things.
I’ve been getting tired of all the Earth parallel realities and alternate realities that I’ve been dreaming about for a while, though gradually, I’ve learned to just embrace it.
I ask the ultimate and wisest of The Divine within both inner and outer worlds:
“What exactly do you want from me? If nothing—since there are billions, trillions, and probably way more Souls that represent YOU—thank you for granting my last request, by helping me to pass away naturally, peacefully and painlessly in my sleep ASAP.
Because I don’t want to be a burden to anyone by taking my life in a dramatic, suicidal way (to include whoever may find my dead body and possibly become traumatized by it).
I no longer have a desire to exist in this or any of the many worlds that I’ve experienced.
I have no desire to reincarnate; this IS my last lifetime.
If there is something you want from me, let me know very soon, because I’m at the point where I’m even losing interest and faith in The Divine in various forms.
And the answer needs to be clearer than all the angel number messages I’ve been reading—with discernment, only taking onboard what FEELS light, and discarding the rest—and mostly and so many vague dream messages that I’ve been doing my best to understand for 13 years.
Thank you Beloved WHOLE selves/Selves/Universe/Multiverse/Omniverse for all the earthly and otherworldly experiences.
It’s been an interesting journey, though I don’t care to repeat any of it again, and I absolutely don’t look forward to any versions of the future.
🖤🤍❤️🧡💛💚🩵💙💜🩷🩶🤎❤️🔥💖
I copy and pasted the following from an email from Ric’s website, after donating $66.66 for now (6666 Crop Circle: Creator of All Creation/Prime Creator/Mother Goddess/WHOLEy Spirit; 666 known during ancient Atlantean times as STRONGEST [manifested] FEMALE ENERGY):
Copy and paste this email to friends to spread the word:
Subject: Don’t buy a ticket to a dolphin show!
Body:
Friend,
I just took the DolphinProject.com pledge NOT to buy a ticket to a dolphin show.
Dolphins have evolved over millions of years, adapting perfectly to life in the ocean. They are intelligent, social and self-aware, exhibiting evidence of a highly developed emotional sense. Here are just a few of the issues with captivity.
– Captures of dolphins are traumatic and stressful and can result in injury and death of dolphins. The number of dolphins that die during capture operations or shortly thereafter are never revealed in dolphinariums or swim-with-dolphins programs. Some facilities even claim their dolphins were “rescued” from the ocean and cannot be released. This claim is almost invariably false.
– Training of dolphins is often deliberately misrepresented by the captive dolphin industry to make it look as if dolphins perform because they like it. This isn’t the case. They are performing because they have been deprived of food.
– Most captive dolphins are confined in minuscule tanks containing chemically treated artificial seawater. Dolphins in a tank are severely restricted in using their highly developed sonar, which is one of the most damaging aspects of captivity. It is much like forcing a person to live in a hall of mirrors for the rest of their life their image always bouncing back with no clear direction in sight.
Join us and pledge that you will not go to a dolphin show or any swim-with-dolphins facility.
Can you join me and take action? Click here: dolphin.fyi/DolphinPledge
Follow Ric O’Barry’s Dolphin Project
https://DolphinProject.com?source=email&
https://www.facebook.com/ricobarrysdolphinproject?source=email&
https://twitter.com/Dolphin_Project?source=email&
https://instagram.com/dolphin_project/?source=email&
Thanks!
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