My mother disowned me yesterday because I would no longer accept her continuous verbal and emotional abuse. I tried to reason with her for the last time, but it didn’t work. I chose to love and stand up for myself since I’m my own best friend now.
No one deserves to be treated with so much hurt. My aunt told me that I should just take whatever my mother says since 1) she doesn’t really mean it and 2) because I’m her daughter.
I love my aunt, but I disagreed with her. I told her that BECAUSE I love my mother, I won’t allow her to continue negative behavior. Unlike the rest of the family, I refuse to walk on eggshells around her; thus, further encouraging her to act out like a child.
I still love her because I intuitively know that she has been through a lot of hurt and suffering, and wasn’t able to heal properly. However, unhealthy attitudes and behavior, regardless of culture, can only be passed down from one generation to the next if people tolerate them. It’s time for some positive change. And if that makes me a bad daughter in my family’s eyes, then so be it. Understanding leads to compassion, and compassion leads to forgiveness, and forgiveness ultimately leads to unconditional love. I pray that she will be watched over and supported during her own spiritual growth.
Added December 22, 2013: Continuation post, “
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Tina, thank you for sharing your touching story with me. It’s comforting to know that there are others, who are on similar journeys, choosing a path of a healthy and positive lifestyle, love, growth and self-empowerment regardless of what society says. Yeah, there’s no reason to feel guilty; you were both meant to take paths that served you the best. Your mother’s soul is free from her body now, and yours is too…free to love yourself unconditionally…to BE Love. I really appreciate your encouragement, words of wisdom and love. Thank you so much for taking the time to share beautiful YOU. It means a lot to me. Many blessings to you, sister. 😀
Thanks Jonathan. Your thoughtful words always touches my soul.
Hey Bobbie… I definitely understand how you must feel. I had to cut my mother off emotionally too bc of her continuous negative energy and compulsive lying due to her drug addiction. When she died I felt very guilty, like I should have done more, but in the end you have to do what’s best for you, regardless of what anyone else says or thinks about it. I loved myself enough to value my sanity and stop the cycle of negativity which a drug addict can suck everyone who loves them into. Be strong and know that your choices are your own and no one has to agree with them! Love & Light to you, sister 🙂
Hi Bobbie…funny that I just posted something on my mother. It’s never simple with thise closest to us. Everything getsnso complicated and twisted. Don’t worry about what others think or say. Your life, your journey, your call. Do what’s best for you.
J.